Cocktail Hour, a webcomic by Scraps

It’s no secret that I like to plan parties. (Sometimes the planning is even more fun than the execution, but only rarely.) Unfortunately, my imagination and notebooks sometimes contain more ideas than I can always accommodate on the calendar. Such is the case with this most recent party idea. Rather than hoard the idea for a year, I’ve decided to share it and hope that if someone uses this idea, they let me know how it goes!

The Commercial Bowl

Not everyone is a football fan but it seems a shame to waste a perfectly good opportunity to party. In order to make the most of the day, why not concentrate on the other fun to be had: the incredible (and sometimes deplorable) commercials that run in multi-million dollar spots throughout the show.

For this to work best, you obviously need a way to view the broadcast plus a DVR to watch and record live television simultaneously. Start the party an hour or so into the game, giving ample time for commercials to accumulate before you begin viewing them. It’s also not a bad idea to track down previous year’s commercials (some commercial collections are available on DVD or you can watch the cable networks for the best- and worst-of shows that air leading up to the big day) for some additional viewing.

Decorate the party room(s) with all sorts of branded items. Raid the party store for party supplies with major labels on them. This is also an excellent opportunity to put those empty boxes leftover from Christmas to work, with their logos readily apparent. Or you could take a page from an old Sabrina, The Teenage Witch episode and make up your own parodies of brand named items to emblazon the walls (I recall Popsi and Butterthumb with particular amusement). Think maximum product placement and then ratchet it up another notch or two.

Serve a variety of finger foods, just like any other Superbowl gathering. Chicken wings, sub sandwiches, chips and dip, etc. Feel free to spruce up each item, depending on your guest list, with your own twists on old favorites or make it easy on yourself and pick up deli platters with absolutely zero guilt.

Because watching commercials isn’t the most exciting thing in the world, make a game out of it by having guests vote on who they think will have the most ostentatious offering before-hand and then take votes on the winner after. Give guests personal whiteboards (purchased or easily created with special paint) and dry-erase markers to be the judges of each commercial. Add in some other games, like the Adverteasing Board Game to round out the fun. With the right group of people this party will be a lot of fun!

Well, that’s partially it. Basically, I’ve got 2 more strips out of this storyline and rather than do 3 this week and 1 next, I figured it’d be best to do 2 and 2. Kinda weaning us all down to the one-a-week posts that will start in February. Those, though, will be full pages, hence the difference. At least to me.

Also, I happen to have come down with sinus/cough/cold ick and it’s tough to do anything but whimper and choke right now. Bother. So 2 updates this week and 2 next (Tuesday and Wednesday). I should still have a Sips posted for Friday, though. I can generally type with my eyes closed (the coughing… you know what I’m talking about, right?).

Going to dig out my humidifier, now…

Of all the things that come to mind when I think New Jersey (Miss Congeniality, The Sopranos, the Turnpike and my aunt who lives there to name just a few), light bulbs are not one of them. Seriously, I don’t know where I thought Thomas Edison lived when he was inventing up a storm, but never did I imagine it was New Jersey.

But so it was that the 3rd state of the Union (as of December 18, 1787) was, indeed, the home of the light bulb, the transistor, FM radio, the drive-in movie, the zipper, saltwater taffy and dirigibles. (The list goes on and on, I’m just hitting some highlights, here.) It also seems somewhat… ironic? that the place whose State Dance is the Square Dance is also home to the 2nd largest gambling town, Atlantic City (and, apparently, the city where the board game Monopoly got it’s property names!). Go figure!

When trying to decide on a drink for New Jersey I did my best to steer away from some of the more negative connotations (landfills, various refineries, hints of organized crime…) and, instead, focus on some fun bits. While the presence of the oldest operating nuclear power plant in the US does put one in the mind of a Flaming Moe (from The Simpsons, for those who don’t watch much television)–and the cough syrup ingredient is rather appropriate as I’m a bit under the weather as of this writing–I decided to go with the zipper and another New Jersey creation: cranberry sauce.

Okay, not the sauce, the juice of the same ilk. Let’s not go overboard, right?

So… zipper. Zippy. Zingy. Zesty. What flavor best equates to zippy for me? Horseradish! No, not quite there. Pepper, suggested Todd. Which led to Tabasco and Worcestershire sauces. Not the right direction, I thought. Then it came to me: ginger!

Again, I’m already on cold meds so alcohol isn’t going to be a good mix. So this week’s shot (or little sipper as I prefer to think of them–after all, if they’re so nasty you have to shoot them down just to make them bearable, why bother?) in non-alcoholic.

The Zipper Berry

1/4-inch coin of fresh Ginger, chopped up a bit
1/4 oz Simple Syrup
1 1/2 oz Cranberry Juice (100% juice blend if possible, no extra sweeteners or substitutes)

Muddle the ginger and syrup together in the bottom of a small cocktail shaker. Add juice and top with ice. Shake like you’re breezing through traffic on the turnpike (a fantasy, sure, but it’s all good!) and strain into a cordial glass.

The chilled concoction is, to me, the very definition of zippy. You get a bit of the sweetened juice and then the ginger zaps the back of your palate like an electrical current. It’s a pretty drink, too, as the muddled ginger clouds the juice ever so slightly as a few of the smaller bits drift down to the bottom of the glass. This would make an excellent brunch beverage or, if made on a larger scale and cut with some ginger ale, a lovely sipper for hot Summer afternoons.

This weekend I was craving a nice, juicy hamburger and while I would have settled for take-out, Todd was nice enough to make a trip to the store (while I slept off another dose of cold meds) for the necessary ingredients to make them at home.

It’s not enough to just form some ground chuck into a disk and toss it on a grill or in a frying pan.

First of all, you have to have the right mix of meat to get good results! Too much fat, like in straight ground chuck, and your burgers shrink to half their size or bunch up in the middle and don’t cook evenly. Too little fat and you wind up with a dry, mealy burger that falls apart on the grill. A 50/50 mix of chuck and lean seems to work best and results in a juicy burger that still fills out the bun.

Secondly, salt enhances flavor, as do other seasonings; don’t be afraid to use them! Salt, pepper, garlic and onion all go into our burger mix. This time we also dashed in a bit of paprika for fun. One thing I do tend to go back and forth on is whether to go powdered or fresh with the onion and garlic. On the one hand, fresh is generally best but it can be tough to finely mince the onions enough that the flavor is evenly distributed. Onion and garlic powders allow, I think, for a greater distribution throughout the meat. We also add a few splashes of Worcestershire sauce, too.

Finally, help the meat stick together by adding some binding agents. Just like you do with meatloaf, an egg and some breadcrumbs certainly won’t hurt the burger and can help a too-lean mix hold up to being flipped over flames. I’ve used oatmeal in the past, instead of breadcrumbs, and Todd’s used crushed potato chips and even rice cereal! As long as it’s fairly finely crushed (a rolling pin and a plastic bag will do if the food processor’s too much of a hassle) it’ll work!

Stove versus Grill

There’s just something about a grilled burger than one done in a frying pan or skillet can’t match. If you have a gas grill, like we do, firing it up (even in January) is no sweat. Charcoal takes, I think, a little more commitment but the flavor is often worth it (though I think having a second item–like some chicken quarters or a pork roast–to cook while the coals are still live is the most efficient use of a charcoal grill). An indoor grill is somewhat superior to a skillet but if you really have a hankering and a frying pan is all you’ve got, then go for it!

What are your qualifications for a really good burger?

Even though I live about a half-hour’s drive from the Florida-Georgia border and even worked in that state (however briefly), I had absolutely no idea that Georgia was one of the original 13 Colonies much less the 4th official state, having ratified the Constitution on January 2, 1788.

(Seriously, we’re getting close to concurrent dates, here–will it happen? I suppose I could peek ahead and see but I like to be surprised. Actually, I don’t, but I’ll make an exception in this instance!)

You know, I bet the Union must have taken it very hard when Georgia seceded is 1861; one of their own betraying them and all. But the Union got their revenge: many battles fought on Georgia clay, General Sherman setting fire to a good portion of the state during his March to the Sea and then it spent the longest time of any of the other Confederate states in Reconstruction. They were the last of the CSA to be readmitted into the Union in 1870. Gee, hold a grudge much?

At any rate, I did know that Georgia was the Peach State and that it also grows a lot of cotton (I’ve passed the fields on my way through that state more times than I can count) and is known for peanut production as well (it’s the state crop). What I didn’t know is that they are #1 in the world for pecan production (though I suppose that shouldn’t surprise me) and are home to the Granite (Ellerton), Poultry (Gainesville) and Carpet (Dalton) Capitals of the World. Pretty impressive stuff.

While many know that Girl Scouts began in Savannah in 1912 and the unfortunate fact that high muckety-mucks in Georgia were responsible for the Trail of Tears in 1838, another thing started in Georgia that might just surprise you: the US Gold Rush! It was not out in California that the first gold was found, but in Dahlonega, Georgia in 1829. You can tour one of those early mines and even pan for gold and gemstones while you’re there!

Peach was the obvious choice for a Georgia drink and even though the Goldschlager was, at first, a novely decision based on the bits of gold floating around the bottom of the bottle it made sense the more I thought about it. Peach pie seasoned with cinnamon, anyone? Exactly!

This drink is also deceptively simple. It actually took 3 tries before we found the right balance between cinnamon and peach. I think this would scale up very easily with the addition of vanilla vodka and a brown sugar-graham cracker rim to make a very nice dessert martini.