Cocktail Hour, a webcomic by Scraps

The first Thanksgiving with the extended New Orleans family after my 21st birthday was a bit surreal: my Uncle was mixing Mimosas but the carton (pour out a third of the juice, fill with Champagne, shake and pour) and offered me one. I think it took my mother by as much surprise as it did me!

Orange juice is one of the most common mixers in cocktails though I’ve never been fond of it’s most common pair-up, Vodka, in the Screwdriver. Of course, that has a lot to do with early vodka experiences and low-quality product.

Taken a step further, there are a variety of orange alcohols and liqueurs available: from the orange-infused vodkas and rums to Grand Marnier and Triple Sec (which comes in a variety of brands).

At the Plantation, we used a lot of Grand Marnier in both the truffles I made to go out with the checks or as turn-down treats as well as in the Creme Brulee desserts (at least, that is, until I got them to agree to chocolate creme brulee… mmmm, Godiva!). Meanwhile, the stronger, pushier Triple Sec stayed in the bar.

Even though it appears in so many cocktails, Triple Sec is a tough taste to balance. Like I said, this is one pushy orange and many times it’s inclusion in a cocktail means that’s one of the few flavors you’re going to get. Not only has this spirit disrupted a pomegranate martini in the past (I know, what were they thinking), too much of a “good” thing can ruin an otherwise drinkable Cosmopolitan.

While on our cruise this past January, our itinerary took us to Roatan, Honduras, where I picked up a small bottle of Vaca Negra Tangerine Liqueur. It smells like concentrated orange soda and, straight, has a lightly orange flavor with a warm base–much like the brandy-based cordials friends had made. And, since I was thinking Cosmo (which, at it’s most basic, is vodka, triple sec and cranberry juice) I decided to give the Vaca Negra a try in place of the usual. The result was tart, refreshing, and not at all overpowering in the citrus department–just enough for flavor without going overboard. (Okay, the vanilla vodka didn’t hurt, either.)

CHF Cultural Cosmo

2 oz Vanilla Vodka
1 oz Vaca Negra Tangerine Liqueur
1 oz Lime juice
2 oz Cranberry juice

Shake everything over ice and serve in a chilled martini glass with an orange twist.

Now, even though the label on my Vaca Negra mentions a States-side importer in Metairie, Louisiana, I’ve been unable to  find any leads online of where to order it. Still, it’s possible to make your own if you’ve got a few tangerines and some time to make an infusion. Pierce a few tangerines and cover with vodka or brandy (my vote is for the latter) for up to 2 weeks. Then, strain off the liquor and let sit for a month before using.

I remember one visit home as a kid, my cousins and I had a slumber party at our grandparents (okay, one cousin is technically an aunt who’s 5 months younger than me and it was her house, but let’s not sweat the semantics). While some of the grown-ups congregated in the dining room we took over the living room, complete with a treat: Shirley Temples.

Shirley Temple

Ice
Grenadine
Ginger ale
Maraschino cherry

Splash some grenadine over ice and top with a healthy pour of ginger ale (other clear sodas can also be used, depending on what you’ve got in the house) and garnish with a cherry (or two).

Now, adult me kind of wonders about the wisdom in giving children faux-cocktails, is it really the best choice? On the other hand, treating it as a special occasion sort of treat might be just the thing for instilling the right attitude about cocktails.

And it’s not just the underage who drink virgin drinks or, as David Biggs refers to them in his book of the same name, “Mocktails.” Alcohol-free drinks are popular from the pregnant to the designated driver and plenty of folks in between. I mean, every now and then a fruity drink might be nice without the worry of a hangover. Or maybe a tart refresher midweek–or even midday–is a welcome change without the booze.

A lot of non-alcoholic cocktails are sweet, either from the additional of soda (clear for clear alcohol, cola for dark) or increasing the fruit juice to make up the difference. A Virgin Mary (just skip the vodka and maybe a dash more clam juice) is a nice change to the sweet or try this one, a definite throw-back to another era:

Jones Beach Cocktail

This savory drink uses lemon juice to balance the saltiness of the beef consomme. To make consomme, dissolve a beef stock cube in a cup of boiling water. [Or use canned]

Crushed ice
1 c Beef consomme, cooled
Half the quantity of clam juice
Juice of 1/2 a lemon (or lime)
1/2 tsp Horseradish sauce
Couple of [dashes] of Worcestershire sauce
Celery salt
Sprig of parsley

Place a scoop of crushed ice in a cocktail shaker and add all the ingredients until well mixed. Now place two ice cubes in a tall glass and strain the blended drink over them. Serve ungarnished or with a sprig of parsley.

–David Biggs, Mocktails

This Cuban drink is currently experiencing its second wind among the cocktail elite, with good reason. It’s tart, refreshing and nice to look at with the muddled mint swirling around the glass.

A Mojito is basically lime, mint and rum topped by club soda or sparkling water. In order to release the oils in the mint, a muddler (kinda like a cross between a pestle and a meat mallet) is used to bruise and break up the leaves without destroying their delicacy. (While the back of a wooden spoon can also be used, an actual muddler isn’t very expensive and can also be used to muddle fruits for sangria, lemonades and other beverages.)

While a good start, sugar (or sugar syrup) is also added in the muddling stage (pre-rum). There seems to be a bit of division between what is best: sugar or syrup. Anyone whose grown up ordering iced tea in restaurants where only unsweetened is available knows full well that regular sugar does not dissolve easily in cold liquids. It may give the muddler more purchase on the mint leaves and seem like the best course of action, you’re just not going to get much sweetening from it. Even knowing this, I still tried recipes using both sugar and sugar syrup and found my hunch to be correct. Leave the sugar for rimming the glass and use a 1:1 simple syrup in your drink.

Even with the syrup, a classic Mojito is much more tart than sweet and I prefer my drinks both tart AND sweet. While in Orlando last year, the Ale House near my brother’s apartment was serving Pineapple Mojitos and it was a divine drink. Tart and sweet and very drinkable. Of course, when the Mojito came up on my list, I knew I needed to recreate that yummy version at home.

CHF Pineapple Mojito

1/4 of a Lime, lengthwise
1 oz Simple syrup
5-7 Mint leaves
2 oz Pineapple rum
Pineapple juice

In a medium glass with a heavy base, place the lime, simple syrup and mint leaves and muddle until the lime is juiced and the mint is a little broken up. Fill with ice and then top with the rum and juice. Stir and sip in contented tropical bliss.

I’m not really a big fan of club soda–to me it tastes like stale water and why would I want to drink that? Consequently, it’s left out of my version of the Mojito. If you wanted to thin it out a bit, a la the classic drink, use about an ounce of pineapple juice and then fill with club soda or sparkling water.

When making Mojitos for a crowd, Stirrings makes a tasty mixer version that just needs rum and club soda. I’ve been known to use tonic water instead of club soda and find even just the mix and the tonic water make a very fresh drink on their own, no rum required.

You know the saying: When life gives you lemons… But why stop at just plain old lemonade? Why not bring lemonade from the stand to the shaker and beyond?

When you hear “Hard Lemonade” it probably brings to mind the bottled malt beverages that come in a variety of flavor options. To make this sort of lemonade, it takes your basic home brew kit, some sorbate-free lemon juice concentrate, malt extract and yeast (the brewing kind). While I’m sure there’s finesse required to make a truly exceptional hard lemonade this way, the 6 to 8 weeks it would take before it was ready is a bit of a deterrent.

If you’d like something a bit quicker, try one of these recipes on for size:

Sunny’s Hard Lemonade
(adapted from Cooking for Real on the Food Network)

4 oz 2:1 Simple syrup
1 oz Vanilla Vodka
2 oz Lemon Juice

Mix over ice in a tall glass. Serves 1. Garnish with a slice of lemon, lime, or both.

Now you know I’m going to love this because of the vanilla vodka, right? Of course! It’s actually a good, fresh lemonade, very tart, but that hint of vanilla just makes it oh-so-good. Plus, with the relatively low alcohol content you could sip these all through a barbecue or pool party with little worry.

Hard Lemonade
(adapted from DrinksMixer.com)

1.5 oz Jim Beam Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey
.5 oz Sweet and Sour Mix
4-6 oz. Sprite
Splash of Grenadine

Combine, in order, in a tall glass over ice.

The original called for Jack Daniel’s but I didn’t have any and Squirt is kinda hard to find around here. I wouldn’t mind trying it with a citrus soda that had more grapefruit influences (I’ll bet I could find a good substitute at World Market–their beverage section is awesome) and see what difference it made. The taste of this version is, obviously, stronger and Todd thinks that going down to a single ounce of Whiskey might be a better plan for those not into the harder flavors. The grenadine really makes this one for me, though, the touch of sweet pink making it more palatable than if it were just the booze and soda.

Of course, if you prefer your lemonade with a different edge, have you ever had the Earl Grey Lemonade from Earl of Sandwich? The recipe couldn’t be simpler: brew a pot of fairly strong Earl Grey tea and then dilute with a can of lemonade mix (the frozen kind is fine) and the 2 or 3 cans of water it calls for. It’s incredibly refreshing and suitable for all ages.

I know that school will be starting again very soon and, with it, the end of what we think of as Summer. But the heat will surely continue for many months, at least down here in Florida, so there’s still plenty of time to enjoy your lemonade–hard or soft.

Kirsch (or kirschwasser) is one of those liqueurs that, if you you have it, you probably have it because you’ve made a Black Forest Cake (aka Kirschtorte) at some point in the not too distant past. This dry cherry brandy is strong! Definitely not something I would ever sip without it being heavily diluted with something very sweet.

But what to do with the bottle on my bar? I dug around through a couple of reliable cocktail books and found a few recipes for drinks that also called for other non-standard ingredients (like Chartreuse and Benedictine–not things I had on hand). Besides, I was looking for something along the comfort-food line and couldn’t stop thinking about that cake!

Black Forest Cake, in case you’ve never had the pleasure, is chocolate cake (I tend to make a genoise and then moisten it with a kirsch syrup), layered and topped with fresh whipped cream and cherries. A lot of bakeries tend to use maraschino cherries but I prefer the sour cherries, spiked with a bit of the kirsch for good measure. Then the sides are usually coated in chocolate shavings. It is a rich, decadent dessert and the last time I made one was for a good friend who’d spent many years serving in Germany; he was very appreciative.

So… cake vs. cocktail. Where shall the two meet? Also on my mind this week was the recent discovery of how lovely a Vanilla Cola was achieved with the addition of vanilla vodka. Since I cannot have caffeine, commercial vanilla cola is not an option as they don’t make a caffeine-free version (at least that’s not loaded with aspartame). Same goes for cherry cola… do you see where I’m going here?

CHF Black Forest Cola

1 oz Vanilla Vodka
1 oz Butterscotch Schnapps
.5 oz Chocolate Liqueur
.5 oz Kirschwasser
6 oz Cola**

Combine the alcohols in an ice-filled shaker, shake it like it’s sliding down the Matterhorn*, and strain it into a tall glass 3/4 full of ice. Top with the soda and then give it a little swirl with a swizzle stick. Garnish with a cherry, if you like.

*yes, I know, the Matterhorn is actually part of the Swiss Alps but the name is German!

**I’m being very brand neutral here, but I prefer caffeine-free Coca Cola classic.

Now, a few things I found out while I was working on this recipe. Kirsch, as I already knew, is strong but Irish Cream smooths it out like you wouldn’t believe (at least at a 1:3 ratio). Notice that there’s no Irish Cream in the final recipe? Yeah, add cola to the list of things Irish Cream does not play well with (the list that includes Strawberry pucker and lime juice)–it started off with a foamy head like you get with a root beer float  which was fine (if necessitating the additional of a straw) but then the rest of the drink decided to behave like biscotti left in tea for too long. It tasted good but the texture was incredibly unappealing (though now I’m in the mood to make a batch of biscotti).

That’s when the butterscotch schnapps came in. Since I was wanting to suggest the tastes of a Black Forest Cake in the drink, the Irish Cream was my go-to for the whipped cream. As a ringer, the butterscotch served the smoothing purposes while also suggesting a bit of warm, baked cakey goodness that definitely made the drink more palatable.

If you search you may find other so-called Black Forest cocktails. But be wary, my friends, if it has not a stitch of cherry (much less Kirsch) inside. Cranberries and raspberries (and the latter’s liqueur) may be tasty and tart, but it does not a Kirschtorte–or Kirsch cocktail–make.

Behold, the lowly Jello Shot. Generally relegated to college parties and other youthful excess, they’re a good way to consume quite a bit of alcohol without realizing just how much.

But let’s look at just the Jello for a moment. Gelatin’s been used in a number of quite grown-up recipes for centuries (various meats and veggies in aspic, mousses and the like) and in the mid-20th century became quite the novelty as packaged foods became more popular. Now it’s a subject of a few jokes but mostly a kid’s snack, a low-cal dessert or a safe food for anyone with a delicate tummy.

I’m not a big fan of the jiggly gel, mostly from associating it more with the latter of the common uses. Still, I did make Jello shots a couple years back for a friends birthday party. It seemed like a good idea at the time but, well… they were horrible. I made the egregious mistake of using cherry jello and vodka for half the water and they tasted like cough syrup (though it occurs to me that maybe tasting them is not something one is supposed to do).

But in trying to figure out where I went wrong, I found an absolute trove of recipes for rather inventive, and potentially tasty, jello shots. Probably the most comprehensive collection can be found at the site of the Jellophile.

In honor of today (July 24) being National Tequila Day I thought it would be fitting to try out the idea of the Margarita Jello Shot. We gave it a few tries, with varying amounts of tequila and other ingredients, and found the following to be the most palatable.

Margarita Jello Shot
(scaled down for small-box size)

3 oz box lime jello
1 c boiling water
3.5 oz cold water
.5 oz lime juice
3 oz tequila
1 oz triple sec

Dissolve the lime jello into the boiling water then stir in the other ingredients. Chill until set.

–Posted by Panthur on RecipeZaar

You can mix up the shots in a large measuring glass with a lip and pour into individual cups (paper or plastic, the latter sprayed with a bit of non-stick spray can help), silicone ice molds or just one large container to be cut up post-chill.

You really don’t want to go over a 3:1 ratio of water to tequila… more than 1 part tequila and your treading into cough syrup territory. We noticed that the lime juice became somewhat opaque in suspension, but it wasn’t overly distracting and, contrary to what I’ve read elsewhere, using a gold tequila (I keep Jose Cuervo Especial on the bar so that’s what we used) did not turn the mixture an olive green.

Apart  from the obvious uses as a party shot, I keep thinking back to the days when jello desserts were a staple at pot-lucks or low-key dinners. Looking through an old recipe card file (Betty Crocker Recipe Card Library, circa 1971) I see there’s a Tomato Aspic ring made with lemon jello–how about updating that for a brunch menu with a bloody mary flair? Need a tropical dessert for a summer barbecue: try some pineapple jello combined with spiced rum and coconut milk, perhaps even served in a pineapple boat!

I’m really into certain kitschy foods (fondue, anyone?) and could totally see myself hosting a dinner party of boozy, throw-back food updated only a little. And I really want to try a pina colada jello shot!

Most people who have encountered Irish Cream liqueur have done so favorably and come away fans. While it does well as a single spirit, over ice or neat, it also pairs with a whole laundry list of others. There are some notable exceptions, however: like the lime juice that tops it in a Cement Mixer and, from personal experiments, strawberry liqueur–the consistency is, well, they call it a Cement Mixer for a reason. Blech!

Back to happier combos! Vodka seems to pair especially well with this spirit and, of course, anything chocolate or coffee. If you treat it as cream with a kick, you can hardly go wrong! This is what gets us such gems as the B52 and the Mudslide, but the cocktail I want to bring you today is a little newer, to me anyway, and with my own twist (mostly due to substitutions to match my current inventory of alcohol). Based on the cocktail known as the Oreo Cookie, I now present to you

The CHF Double-Stuff

1 oz Vanilla Vodka
1 oz Coffee liqueur
1 oz Irish Cream liqueur
1 oz Chocolate liqueur

Combine in a cocktail shaker over ice and then pour into a chilled glass. Makes 1 large cocktail or 2 double shots; after all, it’s good to share!

My love affair with the vanilla vodka continues, as you can see, and my other substitution was Godiva liqueur for creme de cacao. Creme de cacao, from my quickie research, is a lighter chocolate liqueur with a touch of vanilla, so my substitutions seemed incredibly logical. The first sip, according to my co-taster, was very chocolate but then leveled out whereas I got more of the Kahlua and Irish cream. It probably depends on the individual taste buds involved but we both agreed that it blends and mellows with each sip.

While it’s certainly no substitute for a real cookie, it’s a nice treat when you’re not actually hungry but craving something sweet.

Have you ever picked up a bit of seemingly useless trivia and wondered when it was ever going to be useful? Believe it or not, sometimes it actually does.

Case in point: many, many years ago (could be a decade or more) I vaguely remember someone telling me that when a cocktail has the word “wall” in it–like the Harvey Wallbanger, our topic for today–it contains a specific ingredient. Granted, I misremembered one little detail thinking that the ingredient in question was grenadine when it’s actually Galliano.

CHF Harvey Wallbanger

Ice
2 oz Vanilla Vodka
4-6 oz Orange Juice
.5 oz Galliano

Fill a Collins (tall) glass with ice. Pour the vodka over the ice, then the orange juice until almost full. Stir with a bar spoon (or iced tea spoon if it’s handier) and then top with the Galliano. Sip slowly, letting the Galliano mix in a bit with each movement of the glass.

It turns out I was out of plain vodka (oops!) but I had plenty of the vanilla variety. Since the Galliano is described as being a anise-flavored herbal liqueur with vanilla notes I figured it would mix well and, oh, it did.

If a Harvey Wallbanger is a Screwdriver with a little something extra, the Hillary Wallbanger is the Mimosa with a kick. She doesn’t get Champagne, instead you use white wine in place of the vodka but all else is equal. Most of the recipes I found for Hillary used a reverse ratio for wine to juice and also called for a dry white, like a Chardonnay. I happen not to like dry whites and, as always, prefer more mix to hooch, so kept the Harvey proportions and used a sweeter white.

Todd’s vote went squarely to the Harvey though I think if I’d used a Pinot Grigio instead of the Sugar Sands (a muscadine-based sweet white that I already had open) the Hillary may have been more to his liking. I thought Hillary was a nice, sweet mix but could have sipped either one with no quibbles. We both agree that the vanilla vodka enhances the Galliano (whose smell makes me think of root beer) so it will be how we make it from here on out.

Safe Sipping!

Growing up, the only gin I was interested in was the card game of the same name, which Mom and I would play in the evenings on a regular basis. When I reached the legal drinking age, it was one of the liquors I figured I’d never like. After all, it smelled like the tree by the neighbors door and who wants to drink a tree?

Until an old boyfriend (he of the dirty martini, which I still don’t like) introduced me to the tart goodness that is the Gin & Tonic. Oh, my, but it was love at first sip. But, like all new loves, there’s an adjustment period. While attending an event with an open bar I had, perhaps, one (or three) drinks too many for the amount of catered hors d’oeuvres available to balance them out (or lack there of). It didn’t help that the bartender was an old high-school acquaintance and mixed with a generous hand. The party was fun, the next day not so much.

And then there was the time, in an attempt to be suave and sophisticated, I took a nod from the barenaked ladies’ song, “Alcohol,” and attempted to order it as a “G&T.” The guy behind the VFW bar had no clue what I was talking about. Kinda takes the wind out of your sails.

I don’t measure my gin & tonics, nor my gin & cranberries or gin & grapefruits, I just sort of eye-ball it and, like it’s predecessor for the top cocktail spot–the Rum & Coke, it depends a lot on my mood and tastebuds how much juniper berry I really want to taste in relation to everything. Seems the suggestion is 2:1, tonic to gin, and I guess I go more like 4:1 when it’s juice instead of tonic.

One problem some people have with gin & tonic is the tonic, more specifically the taste of the quinine. For the gin and the lime without the taste of quinine, try this recipe for a sharp citrus cooler perfect for Summer days:

Lime Rickey

3/4 oz freshly squeezed lime juice
Ice cubes
1 1/2 oz gin
Chilled club soda
Lime wedge

Dropped the squeezed lime half (which the juice was squeezed from) into a highball glass, and then fill the glass three-quarters full with ice cubes.

Add the gin and lime juice. Top with club soda. Stir, but not too much. Garnish with the lime wedge and serve with a stirring device, preferably a long thin spoon.

—from Good Spirits, AJ Rathbun

I’m not a girl who likes her liquor straight. On the contrary, I prefer mine well-mixered and my favorite class of mixer is fruit juice. Frou-frou umbrellas are not necessary and the blender can usually stay in the cabinet, but a good juice-to-booze ratio makes a happy camper of this cocktail chick.

I went flipping through my mixology books and found a promising “Mocktail” (a non-alcoholic cocktail, from the book of the same name) that I thought had potential. Even better, I had plenty of fresh strawberries and honeydew melon on hand that the recipe called for.

The one criticism I have for the original recipe is that the quantities are not specific. In school my chefs quickly figured out that I was definite a baker (as opposed to a line cook) since I preferred (and always asked for) exact quantities, times and temperatures–everything that’s necessary for proper baking chemistry but more subjective for cooking on a line. How much is a “slice” of honeydew? What, to you, is a “part”? Since one ingredient was pineapple juice and the cans I keep on the bar are 6 oz. I decided that a “part” for this trial would be 3 oz. to prevent waste. (I decided to try the recipe two ways.) Here’s my version of the original:

Fantasia

6 strawberries, hulled and washed (halves are okay if the strawberries are very large)
6 1-inch balls of honeydew melon (I’d just finished a party and had extra melon balls, adjust as necessary)
3 oz orange juice
3 oz pineapple juice
1 c ice

Combine all ingredients in a blender and process until smooth. This makes 1 tall smoothie or 2 short ones to share.

—adapted from Mocktails, David Biggs

Now, this was okay. Todd commented that it was all sort of mushed up together–no one flavor dominated. And that’s okay, really, but it doesn’t make the drink stand out. Even with the amount of liquid in this, it’s still very frothy and a bit chewy. If you, as the original recipe suggest, blend everything but the ice and then pour the mixture over crushed ice it may make a difference. I combined them for convenience.

So we have Fantasia, non-alcoholic and, frankly, G-rated. I was in the mood, however, for something with a little more kick and a little more flavor. This is our preferred version of this cocktail, still low-alcohol so safe for Summer consumption without fear of a hangover, but no longer safe for the kiddies:

CHF* Pink Elephants on Parade

6 strawberries, hulled and washed (halves are okay if the berries are large)
6 melon balls (for more kick, soak them in a little Midori)
3 oz orange juice
3 oz pineapple juice
1.5 oz spiced rum
1 c ice

Blend all ingredients until smooth. Makes 1 tall cocktail or 2 shorter ones: make a friend.

The spiced rum in the Pink Elephant version (does anyone else remember that scene from Dumbo? my favorites were the plaid ones) smooths out the flavor, warms it up even for being a blended ice-drink and gives a pleasant aftertaste.

Safe Sipping!

*Cocktail Hour Favorite. There may be only so many ingredients in a drink but there’s many ways to mix them.